For those of you not in the mommy world, SAHM stands for Stay at Home Mom.

Ryan and I mutually decided early on that when we had children I was going to stay home with them. It meant a lot to me that Ryan viewed staying home with our children as an important choice and just not as a luxury for me. Or a way out of working.

Just so you know, just because I stay home with my son and do not have an official career does not mean that I am on the couch watching Ellen and eating bon bons. In fact, I have never even had a bon bon.

In all seriousness, staying at home with Liam is great, hard, chaotic, blissful, challenging, and what I’m meant to do all rolled in to one. I will never regret having this time with my son because time is something you can never have back. Even if most moments of the day include this…..

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I’m of course not discrediting mothers who have to or choose work. The choice to stay home is personal and highly valued decision for me as a mother. And I can honestly say I could not do it without the full support of my husband. Some days I do feel a sense of guilt or even the need to contribute financially but Ryan always tells me that I’m providing his son with an amazing childhood and that he is eternally grateful. That is a true definition of feeling blessed.

I have not really touched on this subject in any of my posts, but it has recently been prevalent in many conversation topics around me. I will tell you right now it is not easy. It is not always fun. And just because I post mostly good things on social media, life is not perfect. There has been countless days where I want to pull my hair out. Where I feel overwhelmed and never good enough. Days where I don’t feel like cleaning, playing or exerting energy to keep up with Liam’s ever increasing neediness. There has been countless times where it takes me a few minutes to get to his room when he wakes up from nap and plenty of nights where I hand him to Ryan as soon as he walks in the door.

That being said,

I love being around my son constantly to see every change and every growth.  I love being the one to nurture and care for him in ways I can only do. I love making food for him and watching him enjoy it. It’s my favorite part (In old lady voice from The Wedding Singer) And I love teaching him and watching that big brain of his absorb and learn.

A little over a year ago, Ashley and I attended  a speaking from Elizabeth George at Mission Hills Church. She is one of our favorite authors and someone we can both thank for strengthening our marriages. Her views on being a wife and mother may be viewed as old school and way out of touch with the modern world’s ideas of feminism, but I enjoy her books and overall message. The day we attended, she had so much wisdom about being a woman of God, that I scribbled down as many notes as I possibly could. But one thing that really stuck with me is that she said, to do things for our husbands and children not out of obligation but out of love for God in the role he has given you. It completely changed my view on the stacks of laundry and dishes in the sink. I absolutely love making Ryan’s coffee and lunch in the morning. And I love knowing that my child is clean, fed and taken care of everyday (this encompasses a lot in itself)

She also said, “If you are a woman, you ARE busy.

AMEN!

Being a wife and a mother, much is demanded of you. Letting go of the selfishness and embracing the selflessness is essential. But do I attend Wine Down Wednesdays with my girlfriends and indulge in guilty pleasure crap t.v. once a week, you bet I do. My personal time is still very needed. It is important for everyone to have that time to reset, refresh, and start anew, no matter what their role in life is. I am also incredibly blessed with a husband who encourages me always. To be creative, innovative, and to never settle for mediocre.

Just some thoughts I have never shared and thought I would.

So sorry if my lifestyle offends you or you look down on me because of it. But in the end you are the one that is seething at mouth with annoyance reading this, not me 🙂